How many ways can we say “thank you,” “I’m thankful,” or “Happy Thanksgiving?” There are over 7100 living languages on earth, so there’s that. Then, there is a plethora of ways to say we’re thankful, grateful, and how to develop a spirit of gratitude.
I did a little something retro to address the whole concept of gratitude. I consulted a book in print, my “Dictionary of Word Origins,” a much beloved reference book from 1990.
This little bit of research somehow begged for old-school technique rather than a Google search. I enjoy the instant, mostly AI answers from Google as a jumping off point. However, I wanted to see the real deal in this instance.
Speaking of the real deal, I have to share a side-bar comment coming from my two-year-old grandson. He has taken to rejecting his oft sought after favorite snack, a cheese stick, and asking for “real cheese,” instead. His mom and dad have been baffled as to what differentiates “real cheese” in this little one’s mind. Wondering where it came from, his mama asked if we, his grandparents, started the phrase, and trend.
I first denied it. However, I began to wonder if in some passing comment from me to hubby, while I was trapped in play mode and he was free to bring the snack, I said, “just cut up some real cheese,” for example, from a block vs. a cheese stick. And the sharp cookie I was playing with, picked up the “real cheese” moniker, and now won’t have it any other way.
I’ve taken to cutting up all our former cheese sticks on hand, into little cubes. These “real cheese” cubes are received with delight by said, two-year-old.
So, back to the real deal of word origins. Many of our English language words are derived from either Latin or Old French. I personally think it’s cool that we English language speakers can often recognize Latin word origins because of the similarity to English in the word’s structure.
“Thanksgiving” in French is “Action de grace.” As English language speakers with sixty percent of our words coming from Latin and many of the rest derived from Old French, we can suss out that this French phrase translates as an action of grace. And, guess what some cousins of “grace” are? Grateful, gratitude, congratulate, gratuity, gratis, and other similar sounding words related to thankfulness, thanksgiving, or pleasing.
Shall we break this down? When we see that someone has accomplished something for which we are pleased, maybe exceedingly pleased to hear about, we congratulate them.
A gratuity is colloquially known as a tip. We add money to the restaurant, salon, hotel, or taxi bill to show that we are pleased with the service we just received. Originally, we offered a gratuity because we were thankful for exceptional service. In today’s woke world, when gratuities are added without our consent in some establishments, or forced upon us as a “guilt-offering” so as not to be deemed a Grinch, I don’t know.
Some of us “older” folks still remember giving a tip or gratuity because we’re thankful for good service. We’ve presumably had our share of poor service, bad service, or barely any “service” at all and learned to adjust our gratuity accordingly. We don’t really understand being told how much to tip folks in the “service” industry.
My husband and I have been in business for over thirty years and we have become accustomed to including a product in many retail mail-orders, for free. This free product has been known as a “gratis,” as my husband spoke a little Belgian French in his formative years living in the Belgian Congo and impressing the Belgian girls necessitating his speaking their language.
Latin gratus, and French gratis, in this personal example, is a gesture of thankfulness for the order, thus we give a little something back. That’s how we do business. The idea is that generosity should not be transactional but that generosity might be reaped, having given out of a truly generous spirit.
Here’s some musical trivia for you, a “grace note” in a musical composition is added for its flair and beauty, it’s not essential to the composition, it’s there just for the pleasure of it. The words, grace and gratifying are two of the “gratitude” cousins.
Grace is something extra. It’s a thing of beauty and not a given that we all have grace. It’s an elegant, pleasing, embellishment or ornament. Just like a necklace or scarf adds elegance to an outfit, there’s a certain kind of flair to people of grace.
If you’re a gracious person, you stand out as pleasantly kind, courteous, and others are put at ease when around you. You may also be held in some esteem for the benevolence you offer to others, derived from the thankfulness you feel for the favor you’ve received.
Derived from “gratia,” grace and gratification mean, pleasure, favor, and thanks. We’ve often heard it said that certain people have grace to cope with certain situations in which they find themselves. They have a sort of supernatural favor to live through a situation for which most of us could not equally cope.
If we feel pleasure having received an honor or compliment, endured through a difficult task, or completed some such thing that we doubted we could, that’s gratification. We’re usually compelled to say thank you for grace, received.
Let me conclude with this personal anecdote. Probably a dozen years ago, a passerby stopped and asked if I had a home, thinking I was a homeless bag-woman, while I was picking up litter along a secondary road which I frequently walked. Not knowing that my ultimate dream as an adult has been to be thought of as elegant. He surely thought of me as many things, charming not being one of them.
Dear God, give me grace. Thank you in advance. I pray that you all have a very “Joyeux le jour de l’action de grace(s).” Happy Thanksgiving.