The old me, who is by the way the same me as now, but receding – would have immediately hung up the phone and fired off an instructive, detailed complaint telling that company their customer service sucks. However, the current me – the old me receding ever deeper into the past, repented for my total disregard for kindness toward that woman on the phone, just doing her job. I decided to let it go.
Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t completely transformed. I mulled over and over in my thoughts, the precise words I could write, persuading that company into changing their policy to always, close every phone call with, “Is there anything else we can do for you today?”
It’s meant to sound helpful and welcoming, but it couldn’t be more impersonal and nonspecific. After all you called them in the first place regarding a specific issue you’re having with them – specifically, their product, service, etc.
I mean, is there anything more infuriating, after you’ve given your detailed spiel, problem, and plea for help to fix a problem than for the person on the other end of the phone-line to say some version of, “I’m sorry, we can’t help you with that, is there anything else we can do for you?“
“I didn’t call you for something else, I called you for this. Why would I want you to help me with something else when you failed miserably to help me with what might have been in your power to help me with?” – This is what you want to say.
Scream – helpless, now-silent scream.
Yes, sir or ma’am, you can help me with something else. Will you pick up some milk for me? Oh, and the tires need rotating on the van. The light bulb, one of those fancy ones with the smaller twisty insert just blew in the bathroom chandelier. Speaking of lights, the one in our closet must have a spring in it because when we pull the chain to turn it on or off, sometimes it does nothing, sort of chokes – so we have to come back later, after some magical release allows us to turn it on or off. Could you pick up a new one for me? I’ve stumbled around in the dark too many times, just trying to pick out a pair of pants. The recycling needs taken to the bin, and my desk drawer – the one with the keyboard, needs totally rebuilt – it gets stuck every time I try to shut it. Since I need to take an hour and $36 to fix the problem you were unable to help me with, maybe you could do these other things on my list for today. How about it? Oh, is there anything I can do for you?
This reminds me a bit of a quote attributed to Mark Wahlburg that went around on FB recently about Hollywood celebrities – actors and musicians, who live in a bubble but feel free to counsel and instruct us ordinary humans how to think and about what we need to do to live our lives. He went on to say that just because we buy their music or go to their movies gives them no insight into what we have to do to put food on the table or make a living.
I believe this same kind of thinking goes into the customer service policy I described above. The presumption is that I will continue to feel good about their company when they don’t help me solve a problem with their product or service, if they offer something, anything more, in return. It appears that they’re doing everything they can to serve us. In reality, however, they’re doing everything they can to sell us more of their product and service and make us feel good about buying it.
It’s marketing – not a service nor a kindness.
Then there’s the bastardization of the once pleasant but long ago trite farewell, “have a nice day.” Have you noticed how similar to – “how ya doing?” “how are you?” and “what’s up?” – “have a nice day,” lacks sincerity? Lol
Most people don’t really expect a response to these, once sincere, questions. They ask, how ya doing (no longer a question requiring an answer) and keep walking and doing their business. They don’t want a litany of ailments, a story of your unpaid bills, a line by line account of your mistreatment by a customer service agent or anything other than, “fine, how are you,” as you both move on with your day.
But, with “have a nice day;” it’s gotten twisted to the point that the whole phrase is an antonym, used to insult someone after verbally or circumstantially assaulting them – a social-verbal slap in the face. For example, “Here’s your speeding citation. You have yourself a nice day.” Hasn’t that ship already sailed?
Or, “this $3,000 dental procedure isn’t covered by your insurance, nor can it be applied to your annual deductible or out of pocket total – have a nice day.” Or, “I’m sorry your $5,000 appliance completely failed on day 366 from your purchase date and we cannot cover it under the warranty, but for $79.99 we can set you up with a protection plan. Have a nice day.”
No thank you, you reply – holding back tears and your flailing arms – perched to punch her/him in the face; and he/she closes the encounter with – “Is there anything else we can do for you today?” To which, you meekly whisper in defeat, “No, thank you” (thanking them for nothing, but trying with all that’s in you to be kind). And they say, “Have a nice day.” 🙂